Tuesday, February 7, 2012

State of the Union #1: "The Danger Element"

This past Friday marked three weeks that Mike and I have been engaged and already I am feeling that tidal wave a-comin.' The stress, the amount of details, the planning, the budgeting, and that's not even touching the surface of more touchy subjects like family dynamics and a very long guest list. On the bright side, it has made Mike and I look at how rich our lives are in terms of friends and family. There are so many people we want to have share that day with us and people from all over the country. We have two very full lives and we are excited to really merge them together and keep growing forth. But shit, that idea becomes so quickly lost! Guests become numbers, numbers become dollars and dollars become anxiety. I keep telling Mike, do you really want to enter this world? Do you really want to have arguments over Chilean Sea Bass and whether fondant cake goes well with buttercream filling and who the hell we can actually sit at table 8? Do you want to enter this world for the next year?!! I keep trying to push going to Mexico on him, so we can skip all of this. Of course he doesn't understand because he doesn't get worked up about stuff like this. Instead he just laughs at me and says, We're having a wedding. And I hate to admit this, but there is a part of me that is relieved when he says that because the truth is, I do want a wedding. But I am torn between thinking I don't really want one and then wanting the sun and moon. In either scenario I am lying to myself. And in either scenario I am disappointing myself before this ball even gets rolling.

But thankfully, I have some very creative friends who are also veteran brides and have already offered support, advice and one in particular who sent me this amazing clip from Portlandia. I burst out laughing at "the danger element" and "show dead people." This is where I'm at, people. And all ideas for an outdoor venue in New York or New Jersey that does not make you sign away your first-born, send 'em this way. Thanks.

9 comments:

Erin said...

i heard rutgers gardens was really affordable, but you have to be out by 10PM, i think.

daleboca said...

My only words of wisdom are... the longer you wait, the bigger it gets in every sense. DO NOT invite everyone and anyone. "We went to theirs" or "we used to be great friends" does not equal an invitation:)

Carmen said...

kuser farm?

Lindsey said...

We are actually looking into the Kuser farm!

Lindsey said...

daleboca, thanks for the guidelines. I like 'em!

Unknown said...

What daleboca said is very smart! Melanie (your NYC cousin) was married in Central Park and it was wonderful.
Your cousin Margot

zach brandau and julie matranga said...

I second the Kuser farm. And this comment doesn't equal an invitation.

zach brandau and julie matranga said...

Or Blue Hill at Stone Barns? I know these guys are a working farm in upstate New York, but not much else. Upstate could equal pricey????

Nick said...

My brother had a Vegas wedding last year & it was surprisingly nice (not tacky whatsoever). That way you can invite everyone, but not everyone will attend. Then hold a reception where you live now & those people that couldn't make Vegas might make that reception.