Sunday, October 24, 2010

halloween: a day for pilgrims

i've decided that i don't like halloween anymore.
i suppose i haven't for awhile
and i don't know why i have agreed to work at the door of a huge halloween party
where i will be telling drunk assholes and pretty sluts whether or not they are on "the list"
it all reeks of desperation with the bitter taste of sadness.
i can't ever remember really liking it.
at my first school, a christian school, we were not allowed to celebrate "the devil's day" so we were made to celebrate "colonial day" where you cam dressed as your favorite pilgrim or American historical figure.
I have been Betsy Ross, Martha Washington and Susan B. Anthony.
perhaps this is what killed the joy of it for me.
there was also the colonial day when we came home and found mom on the couch and the phone off the hook
the next day was halloween but i was sent to stay with Aunt Gail for a few days and i didn't have a costume.
so she dressed me as a witch and tried to get me to wear green face paint that made my skin itch
that halloween we went to one house that was flooded with people.
when we got to the door, we found that it was mary kate and ashley olsen dressed as cinderellas handing out candy while a barrage of people took their photographs
i remember thinking that maybe they were giving out special candy. but it turns out it was just snickers like the rest of us.
the year my parents divorced, my brother and i spent perhaps our last halloween trick or treating.
my mom made our costume- we were a two-headed monster which really just was a black sheet with two holes cut out. i remember being annoyed throughout the night because he was slower than me. but i was glad that we were in this together.
as a teenager, i went one year as parker posy in dazed and confused and one year as sally bowles which may have been my best costume ever.
but as an adult, the costumes are few and far between and none of them clever- black mamba from kill bill, a cowgirl, magenta from rocky horror picture show and maggie gylenhaal.
this year i am going as me with a subtle suggestion of freddy krueger-red and black striped sweater and hopefully a hat and maybe fingerless gloves.
considering the plethora of colorful dreams i have been having for the past six months, going as the killer sandman gives me some false sense of empowerment or maybe it is just more depressed morbidity. either way, i will be warm while sexy ladybugs and playboy bunnies and lady gagas and snookies will be freezing their asses off around me.


Carmen said...

i might have gloves for you...

daleboca said...

so happy you are not a whore version of a nurse or nun or dentist this year. those costumes were a bit much!

Isabel said...

slutty dentist is a good idea