Friday, May 23, 2008

the importance of not wearing makeup for two days

the past two nights i slept over at one of my most favorite people in the world
i walk in her small harlem flat and if i had my eyes clothes, i would still know exactly where i was
the smell of eucalyptus greets you at the door and the space feels free, open, bright
if i were blind i would know i was in a very special place and not just any place but her place
she hangs bright sheets and various pictures from around the world and photos of her family and some of me and a trapeze artist hangs in the middle of the room.
a powerful photo of her as a child in a moment of what looks like defeat or maybe frustration or defeat hangs high but nothing hangs as high as the tapestry that reads "listen"
and she's right, the crappy frame she has it in does take away from the freedom of its speech
she puts on her music and it feels like her
sensual, funny, unpredictable and i feel somewhat envious of this world, this complete reflection of her presence.
i am struck by the picture of her as a child.
i want a picture of me in a moment like that and i would also hang it high in my room to remind me that failure is something we need. it is part of what makes us whole. what makes us brilliant.
we drink wine, eat pasta, we talk until one of us falls asleep or back asleep.
in the morning she lends me anything i need. underwear, toothbrush, her prized fancy boots.
but she does not have mascara. i am forced to go without make up for two days. throughout the days i catch glimpses of myself in the mirror, nut i realize that i pay attention to my little flaws less and less because i feel a certain sort of pride in showing my face to the world-raw, uninhibited, uncovered. i look younger. i feel a small sense of a cleansing effect
and i am reminded of one of the major reasons i came back to this magical place.
there is no one in the world like her and i am a better person after having been in her presence.

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