Friday, February 15, 2008

exchanging farewells while waiting for the elevator

we step off the elevator and drop off our bags
"i have something for you," she hands me a letter.
"thanks."
"you can't read it now."
"i can't read it now. i'll start crying."
we laugh...it falls silent.
"i don't know what to say," i hug her tightly.
"i don't know what i'm going to do without you."
"you'll be fine."
"its cool that we're both going in such different directions."
"the right directions."
"your friendship means...so much to me," i hate this stuff. i don't let myself feel it, even though i know i will be so incredibly sad."
"i'm going to go, before i get all..."
she laughs, "ok, good."
we part ways and it feels empty. 
i cannot believe that was it and now everyday will be different. 
i suck at saying goodbye. i'm either a robot or a blubbering mess. 
but i think everyone prefers the robot. 
i told her i loved her, i told her i would miss her and i thanked her...
but in the end, i still don't think anything i said was enough.
but maybe it never would have been.


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